In my ongoing series, "Choose Your Difficult: Navigating the Complex Choices of Dog Ownership," we’ve been exploring the pivotal decisions that shape our relationships with our dogs. The essence of "Choose Your Difficult" is the understanding that every path in dog ownership comes with its own set of challenges. There is no easy way out, but we can make informed choices about which difficulties we are willing to face to create the best possible outcomes for both our dogs and ourselves. In the first article, we discussed the balance between affection and boundaries; in the second, we emphasized the importance of early training. In this third article, we will look into the critical importance of consistency—a cornerstone of effective dog ownership that is essential for fostering a well-behaved, secure, and content dog.
Consistency in dog ownership is about creating a structured environment where your dog knows what to expect and what is expected of them. While this might seem straightforward, maintaining consistency in our often chaotic and busy lives is anything but simple. It requires discipline, commitment, and a deep understanding of how our behavior and decisions impact our dog’s behavior and emotional well-being. The choice you face here is between the short-term convenience of being flexible or inconsistent and the long-term benefits of maintaining a structured, predictable environment for your dog.
The Importance of Consistency: Building Trust, Respect, and Security
Consistency is crucial in building a foundation of trust, respect, and security in your dog’s life. While dogs do benefit from routine and predictability, their true sense of security comes from trusting and respecting their owner’s consistent behavior and guidance. When dogs know they can rely on you to be clear and steady in your actions, they develop a deeper trust and respect for you, which in turn fosters a strong sense of security.
When your dog learns that their behavior—and your consistent responses to it—dictates what happens next, they feel more confident and secure. This goes beyond merely following a routine; it’s about ensuring that your dog understands they can trust and respect you to provide clear rules and consistent enforcement. Inconsistent behavior from owners—whether it’s changing the rules, being unpredictable in responses, or failing to maintain clear expectations—can erode this trust and respect, leading to confusion and anxiety in dogs. A dog that cannot trust or respect what to expect from their owner may become stressed, and this stress often results in unwanted behaviors such as aggression, anxiety, or destructiveness.
By maintaining consistency in your interactions, commands, and responses, you help your dog build trust, respect, and security. They come to see you as a reliable leader who provides stability, making them feel safe and respected. This trust and respect strengthen your bond, as your dog understands that their behavior, guided by your consistent cues, influences their environment. In this way, you create an atmosphere where your dog can thrive, confident that their needs will be met predictably and securely through the trust and respect they have for you.
My Philosophy of Consistency: Keep Pavlov Small and Skinner Big
One of the core tenets of my training philosophy is the idea that dogs should look to their humans and the behavior of their humans as the primary source of information about what is going to happen next, rather than relying on environmental cues. This is encapsulated in my mantra: "Does my behavior influence what happens to me?" The question that every dog should be asking, rather than "Does my environment predict what happens to me?"
In simple terms, this means that your dog should learn to associate their behavior with outcomes, rather than automatically reacting to environmental stimuli. For instance, if your dog gets excited just because you pick up the leash and put on your shoes—thinking that this automatically means they are going for a walk—this is a sign of trouble. These environmental cues should be neutral; they should not trigger a heightened state of arousal or excitement. Instead, your dog should wait for a command or cue from you before reacting.
I often say, "Keep Pavlov small and Skinner big." Pavlovian conditioning (classical conditioning) is about associations formed between neutral stimuli and reflexive responses, while Skinnerian conditioning (operant conditioning) is about learning through the consequences of behavior. In the context of dog training, this means that environmental cues (Pavlov) should have a minimal impact on your dog’s behavior, while their behavior in response to your behavior and cues (Skinner) should be the primary determinant of outcomes.
The Role of Consistency in My Training Philosophy
Consistency plays a crucial role in ensuring that your dog looks to you for cues rather than to the environment. When you are consistent in your commands, routines, and responses, your dog learns that it is their behavior in response to your cues that matters most. This reduces their reliance on environmental triggers and helps prevent the development of anxiety, over-arousal, and other behavioral issues.
People are often very inconsistent in their behavior, which leads to dogs becoming anxious, unruly, and overly aroused. When the rules change from day to day, or when commands are sometimes enforced and sometimes not, dogs become confused and stressed. This inconsistency can result in behaviors such as excessive vocalization, hyperactivity, and difficulty settling down.
The difficult choice here is to maintain consistency, even when it’s inconvenient. This means adhering to rules and routines, enforcing commands consistently, and making sure that everyone in the household is on the same page. The payoff for this effort is a dog that understands the boundaries, feels secure in their environment, and is less likely to develop behavioral issues.
The Short-Term Convenience vs. Long-Term Stability
Choosing to be consistent in your dog’s life often requires sacrificing short-term convenience. It’s easy to let things slide—allowing your dog on the couch one day and then scolding them for it the next, or letting them pull on the leash when you’re in a hurry. While these small lapses might seem harmless, they erode the structure, predictability, and trust that your dog relies on.
When you are inconsistent in your responses, even in small ways, it sends a clear message to your dog: you are not trustworthy. Dogs thrive on clear, consistent signals from their humans because these signals help them understand their world and how to navigate it. When those signals are mixed or unpredictable, it creates confusion and anxiety for your dog. They start to question whether they can truly rely on you to provide clear guidance and maintain stable boundaries. This lack of trust will lead to a host of behavioral issues, as your dog no longer feels secure in your leadership.
The difficult choice here is to commit to consistency, even when it’s inconvenient. This means sticking to the rules and routines you’ve established, even when you’re tired, busy, or simply not in the mood to enforce them. It requires ensuring that everyone in the household is on the same page, consistently enforcing the same rules and providing the same responses to your dog’s behavior.
By choosing consistency, you are reinforcing your dog’s trust in you. They learn that they can rely on you to be a stable, predictable leader, which in turn makes them feel secure in their environment. This consistency helps your dog understand their boundaries, reduces their anxiety, and significantly lowers the risk of developing behavioral issues. The payoff for your effort is a stronger, more trusting relationship with your dog and a more harmonious household overall.
The Role of Routine in Dog Ownership
Routines undeniably play a crucial role in maintaining consistency, but it’s essential to understand that routine is more than just following a strict schedule—it’s about managing the expectations we set for our dogs. While predictability can provide a sense of control and comfort for your dog, it can also lead to frustration and unwanted behaviors if those expectations are not consistently fulfilled.
1. Building Expectations Through Routine:
When we establish routines such as specific feeding times, walks, training sessions, and engagement periods, our dogs begin to form strong expectations about how their day will unfold. For example, if your dog is always fed at the same time each morning, they will come to expect food at that time, and any deviation from this expectation can lead to anxiety, restlessness, or even demanding behaviors. Similarly, a dog that anticipates a walk at a specific time every day may become overly excited or frustrated if that walk is delayed or skipped.
While it’s natural to want to provide a structured environment for our dogs, it’s crucial to avoid creating rigid expectations that can’t always be met. Instead of allowing your dog’s routine to be governed by the clock or specific environmental cues (like picking up a leash or putting on shoes), I advocate for a different approach. The focus should be on building a dog that looks to you—your behavior, cues, and commands—to understand what’s going to happen next, rather than relying on a fixed routine or external triggers.
2. The Throw Away the Food Bowl Concept:
One way to break the cycle of expectation-based frustration is through the "throw away the food bowl" concept. Instead of feeding your dog at set times in a bowl, all food should come directly from your hand during training, engagement sessions, or walks. This approach shifts the focus from a predictable routine to an interactive experience where your dog learns that good things come from paying attention to you, rather than expecting them automatically from the environment.
By integrating feeding into training and engagement, you reinforce the idea that your dog’s behavior influences outcomes, not just the passage of time or external cues. This method encourages your dog to remain attentive and engaged with you throughout the day, rather than becoming fixated on when the next meal or walk will happen.
3. Creating a Dog Resilient to Change:
When your dog learns to look at you for guidance rather than relying on environmental patterns, they become more resilient to changes in routine. Life is unpredictable, and there will inevitably be days when the usual walk is delayed, or when you’re unable to engage in a training session at the expected time. A dog that has been conditioned to look to their owner for cues will handle these disruptions much better than a dog that is solely reliant on a rigid schedule.
By making sure your dog understands that their behavior and your cues determine what happens next, rather than the environment or the clock, you build a dog that is adaptable and less prone to frustration. This approach not only reduces anxiety and unwanted behaviors but also strengthens the bond between you and your dog, as they learn to trust in your leadership and rely on your guidance, regardless of the situation.
4. Training Routines with Flexibility:
Consistency in training is crucial, but it should also be flexible enough to prevent the development of rigid expectations. Training should be seen as an ongoing conversation between you and your dog, where they learn that paying attention to you and responding to your commands leads to positive outcomes. This means practicing commands regularly, using consistent cues and rewards, but varying the context and timing to prevent your dog from becoming overly dependent on a fixed routine.
Inconsistent training or unpredictable enforcement of commands can lead to confusion and frustration for your dog. For example, if you allow your dog to jump on people when they greet them sometimes, but scold them for it at other times, your dog will struggle to understand what is expected. This inconsistency weakens the trust between you and your dog and can lead to behavioral problems.
However, by maintaining consistent expectations through your behavior and commands—while allowing flexibility in timing and environment—you help your dog develop the ability to adapt to changing circumstances without becoming anxious or unruly. This approach ensures that your dog remains focused on you and your cues, rather than becoming fixated on environmental patterns that may not always be reliable.
The Balance Between Routine and Flexibility
While routines are important in providing structure and predictability in your dog’s life, it’s essential to avoid creating rigid expectations that can lead to frustration and unwanted behaviors. By ensuring that your dog looks to you for guidance and cues, rather than relying on environmental triggers or a strict schedule, you build a dog that is resilient, adaptable, and less prone to anxiety.
The "throw away the food bowl" concept is one effective strategy for shifting your dog’s focus from routine to engagement, reinforcing the idea that their behavior—and your responses—determine outcomes. By integrating feeding into training and engagement sessions, you create a more interactive and responsive relationship with your dog, reducing their reliance on environmental cues and increasing their trust in you.
Ultimately, the goal is to create a dog that is confident and secure, not because their day follows a predictable pattern, but because they trust in your leadership and know that their behavior will influence what happens next. This approach not only reduces frustration and behavioral issues but also strengthens the bond between you and your dog, leading to a more harmonious and fulfilling life together.
The Impact of Inconsistency on Behavior
Inconsistency can have a profound impact on your dog’s behavior. When dogs receive mixed signals or when rules are not consistently enforced, they may become confused about what is expected of them. This confusion can lead to a range of behavioral issues, from anxiety and stress to more severe problems like aggression or separation anxiety.
1. Anxiety and Stress:
Dogs are highly perceptive animals that pick up on inconsistencies in their environment. When they don’t know what to expect or when rules change frequently, they can become anxious or stressed. This anxiety can manifest in various ways, such as excessive barking, destructive behavior, or even physical symptoms like digestive issues.
2. Aggression:
In some cases, inconsistency can lead to aggression. For example, if a dog is sometimes allowed to guard resources like food or toys and other times is punished for it, they may become confused and react aggressively when they feel their resources are threatened. This kind of inconsistent handling can lead to serious behavioral issues that are difficult to correct.
3. Disobedience:
Inconsistency can also lead to disobedience. If a dog is not sure when or if a command will be enforced, they may start to ignore commands altogether. For instance, if you sometimes enforce a “stay” command and other times let your dog move around freely, they may start to disregard the command entirely, leading to further disobedience.
The Challenges of Maintaining Consistency
Maintaining consistency with your dog is no easy feat. Life is unpredictable, and it’s often challenging to stick to routines and enforce rules when circumstances change. However, the commitment to consistency is critical if you want to build trust, respect, and security in your dog’s life. Here are some of the common challenges dog owners face when trying to maintain consistency and strategies to overcome them.
1. Time Constraints:
One of the most significant challenges to maintaining consistency is time. Busy schedules can make it difficult to maintain the same level of engagement or training every day. However, it's essential to remember that consistency doesn’t necessarily mean adhering to a strict schedule, but rather maintaining consistent behavior and expectations regardless of the time of day.
For example, even if your routine is disrupted, ensure that your interactions with your dog remain consistent in terms of commands, rewards, and boundaries. If you can’t engage in a training session at the usual time, make sure that when you do, the same methods and expectations apply. This helps your dog learn that it’s your behavior and cues that matter, not the clock or the environment.
2. Inconsistent Household Members:
Another significant challenge to maintaining consistency is ensuring that everyone in the household is on the same page. Inconsistent handling from different family members can confuse your dog, undermine the established rules, and erode the trust you've worked hard to build. It’s essential to establish clear communication among all members of the household about the rules and expectations for the dog.
One effective strategy is to hold a family meeting to discuss and agree on the rules for the dog. Write these rules down and place them in a visible location where everyone can be reminded of them. Make sure each person understands the importance of consistency and their role in maintaining it. By ensuring that all household members are consistent in their interactions with the dog, you create a stable, predictable environment that reinforces trust and respect.
3. External Distractions:
External distractions, such as visitors, other animals, or changes in the environment, can also disrupt consistency. These distractions can cause your dog to become overly excited, anxious, or confused, making it more challenging to maintain the rules and routines you’ve established.
To maintain consistency despite external distractions, it’s important to anticipate potential challenges and plan accordingly. For instance, if you have guests visiting who are unfamiliar with your dog’s rules, take the time to explain the rules to them and ask them to follow the same routines you use or better tell them to ignore your dog and not interact at all. If your dog is easily distracted by other animals, work on training them in controlled environments before gradually introducing them to more distracting situations. By preparing for external distractions and maintaining consistency in how you handle them, you help your dog stay focused, secure, and trusting, even in new or challenging environments.
4. Emotional Challenges:
Maintaining consistency can also be emotionally challenging. It’s natural to want to comfort your dog when they are anxious or to relax the rules when you’re tired, stressed, or simply not in the mood to enforce them. However, it’s crucial to recognize that inconsistency, even when it stems from good intentions, can lead to confusion, stress, and a breakdown in trust between you and your dog.
The difficult choice here is to remain consistent, even when it’s emotionally challenging. This means enforcing the rules and routines you’ve established, even when it would be easier to let things slide. It’s about understanding that maintaining consistency is in your dog’s best interest, even if it requires extra effort or emotional resilience on your part. Each moment of consistency reinforces the trust and respect your dog has in you, helping them feel secure and confident in their environment.
Strategies for Maintaining Consistency
Maintaining consistency is a cornerstone of responsible dog ownership, and there are several strategies you can implement to make this easier to achieve. These strategies help you navigate the challenges of maintaining structure and predictability in your dog’s life, ensuring that they feel secure, respected, and well-behaved.
1. Establish Clear Rules and Boundaries:
The first step in maintaining consistency is to establish clear rules and boundaries for your dog. These should be straightforward, easy to follow, and consistently enforced by everyone in the household. It’s helpful to write down these rules and place them in a visible location so that all household members are reminded of them regularly. This clarity ensures that your dog receives the same signals and expectations from everyone, reducing confusion and helping them understand what is expected.
For example, if you decide that your dog is not allowed on the furniture, this rule should be enforced by everyone in the household, without exceptions. If your dog is only allowed to eat during training sessions or from your hand, ensure that this practice is followed consistently. By setting clear and consistent boundaries, you create an environment where your dog knows what to expect, which helps reduce anxiety and enhances their overall behavior.
2. Use Consistent Commands and Cues:
Consistency in language is also crucial when communicating with your dog. Dogs respond best when commands and cues are consistent in both wording and tone. If you use the word “come” to call your dog one day and “here” the next, your dog may become confused about what is being asked of them.
To maintain consistency, choose specific commands for each behavior and stick to them. Additionally, ensure that everyone who interacts with your dog uses the same commands. This uniformity in cues reinforces training and ensures that your dog understands and reliably responds to commands.
3. Create a Flexible Routine Anchored in Behavior:
While maintaining consistency is important, it’s equally essential to recognize that life is unpredictable. Instead of relying solely on rigid schedules, focus on creating a routine that is anchored in your behavior and cues rather than the time of day. This flexible approach helps you maintain consistency without being overly rigid, allowing you to adapt to changes in your schedule while keeping the structure and expectations intact.
For example, if you typically engage in training or walks in the morning but have an unexpected meeting, ensure that your dog still receives engagement later in the day, maintaining the same commands and expectations. The key is that your dog learns to rely on your cues rather than the clock, which builds their adaptability and resilience.
4. Consistently Reinforce Positive Behavior:
Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool in maintaining consistency and reinforcing desired behaviors. When your dog follows the rules or performs a command correctly, be sure to reward them with praise, treats, or playtime. This consistent reinforcement helps your dog understand which behaviors are expected and encourages them to repeat those behaviors in the future.
It’s crucial to ensure that rewards are given consistently for the same behavior. For instance, if your dog sits on command and sometimes receives a treat and other times does not, they may become uncertain about whether sitting is the correct response. By consistently rewarding desired behaviors, you build a strong foundation for good behavior and help your dog understand what is expected.
5. Anticipate Challenges and Plan Ahead:
Anticipating potential challenges and planning ahead are crucial for maintaining consistency, even in difficult situations. One common scenario that can disrupt consistency is when you have visitors who may not be familiar with your dog’s rules or who might inadvertently reinforce behaviors you’re trying to discourage.
To handle this, it’s important to prepare in advance. Start by explaining the rules to your guests and asking them to follow the same commands and routines you use with your dog. For instance, if your rule is that the dog is allowed to jump on people, make sure your visitors understand this and are ready to accept the jumping of the dog if they attempt to jump.
Another effective strategy is to ask your guests to completely ignore the dog upon arrival. This helps prevent your dog from becoming overly excited or anxious and reinforces the idea that calm behavior is rewarded. Ignoring the dog can reduce their stress and keep them from engaging in unwanted behaviors, such as jumping or barking for attention.
If you anticipate that your guests might have difficulty adhering to your dog’s rules, or if your dog tends to become overly stimulated by visitors, consider crate training as a proactive measure. Crate training allows you to set your dog up for success by providing them with a safe, secure space away from the visual and audible stimulation of the guests. Placing your dog in a crate in a separate room during the visit not only helps maintain consistency in their behavior but also ensures they feel safe and relaxed, free from the pressures of the unfamiliar situation.
By anticipating challenges and planning ahead, you can maintain consistency in your dog’s training and behavior, even in unpredictable situations. This approach not only reinforces your dog’s trust in your leadership but also sets them up for success by minimizing the chances of confusion or anxiety in challenging scenarios.
6. Stay Committed to Consistency:
Maintaining consistency requires commitment and discipline, especially when it’s tempting to relax the rules or routines. It’s important to remember that consistency is in your dog’s best interest, even if it requires extra effort on your part. Staying committed to consistency means enforcing the established rules and routines every day, regardless of how busy, tired, or stressed you may be.
The difficult choice here is to prioritize your dog’s well-being over short-term convenience. Recognizing that the effort you put into maintaining consistency will pay off in the form of a well-behaved, secure, and happy dog is key. This commitment to consistency is a critical component of responsible dog ownership and is essential for fostering a strong, positive relationship built on trust and respect.
The Role of Consistency in Strengthening the Human-Dog Relationship
Consistency does more than just improve your dog’s behavior—it plays a crucial role in strengthening the relationship between you and your dog. When your dog knows what to expect from you and understands the rules of their environment, they are more likely to trust you and feel secure in your leadership. This trust is the foundation of a strong, positive relationship.
1. Building Trust:
Trust is built on predictability and reliability. When you consistently enforce rules and maintain clear communication, your dog learns that they can rely on you to provide structure and guidance. This reliability fosters trust, making your dog more likely to listen to you, follow your commands, and look to you for direction in new or challenging situations.
A dog that trusts their owner is more confident and well-adjusted. They understand that their owner will meet their needs, protect them from harm, and guide them through unfamiliar experiences. This trust is essential for cultivating a strong, healthy relationship between you and your dog.
2. Enhancing Communication:
Consistency also enhances communication between you and your dog. Human behavior is a constant form of communication with your dog, whether intentional or not. Every interaction you have with your dog communicates something to them, so it’s vital that this communication is consistent and clear. When you use consistent commands, cues, and routines, alongside consistent behaviors, your dog clearly understands what you are asking of them and what is expected in return. This clear and reliable communication reduces confusion and frustration, making it easier for your dog to learn and respond appropriately.
Improved communication leads to a more harmonious relationship, where both you and your dog understand each other’s needs and expectations. Recognizing that your behavior is always communicating something to your dog, you can ensure that this ongoing interaction supports your training goals and reinforces the trust and respect that form the foundation of your relationship.
3. Promoting a Calm and Balanced Dog:
A dog that lives in a consistent environment is more likely to be calm and balanced. They understand the rules, know what to expect, and feel secure in their surroundings. This sense of security reduces anxiety and stress, leading to a happier, more well-adjusted dog.
A calm and balanced dog is not only easier to live with but also more enjoyable to be around. They are more likely to behave appropriately in various situations, making it easier to include them in family activities and social events. This inclusion further strengthens the relationship between you and your dog, as they become a valued and trusted member of your family.
Conclusion: The Power of Consistency in Dog Ownership
Throughout this article, we’ve delved into the pivotal role that consistency plays in dog ownership. It’s clear that the decision to maintain consistency is not always the easiest path, but it is undeniably crucial for nurturing a well-behaved, secure, and confident dog. This is where the “Choose Your Difficult” philosophy truly resonates—by embracing the challenge of being consistent, you are making a profound investment in your dog’s future, where their behavior is predictable, their trust in you is unwavering, and your relationship is solid and enduring.
Consistency is the bedrock upon which a well-adjusted, confident, and secure dog is built. It demands commitment, discipline, and a conscious choice to prioritize your dog’s long-term well-being over the fleeting convenience of the moment. Every time you choose to be consistent, you are communicating clearly to your dog that they can trust you to provide structure, guidance, and stability. This not only helps prevent behavioral issues but also deepens the relationship you share with your dog.
A dog that knows what to expect and understands the rules of their environment is a dog that feels safe, secure, and valued. The effort you invest in maintaining consistency will be rewarded in numerous ways. You’ll find that your dog listens to you, trusts your leadership, and behaves appropriately across a variety of situations. The result is a stronger relationship, improved communication, and a more harmonious household. Above all, you’ll have a dog that is happy, confident, and secure in their relationship with you.
As we conclude this discussion on the importance of consistency, remember that the choices you make today will shape your dog’s behavior and the quality of your relationship for years to come. Consistency may be challenging, but it is always worth the effort. By choosing your difficult wisely and committing to consistency, you are laying the groundwork for a fulfilling and harmonious life with your canine companion.
In the next article of this series, we will explore the essential role of socialization and exposure in dog ownership. We’ll tackle the challenges of balancing safety with new experiences and discuss how the choices you make in socializing your dog can profoundly influence their behavior, confidence, and ability to navigate the world around them.